For People.....Part 1

"Bhaiya Aap thoda Hindi Samajhte ho??" ....Generally I don't like to react much after the days work . On my weekdays way from my office to PG  i always dream of having a power nap during the walk. As I looked around to discover the source of the question , I saw a middle aged man with his wife and  little daughter looking pale and visibly tired while fighting with the cold winds of the December evening. As I nodded slowly, the man told me that he was a 'rang-mistri'. He had come a long way to the town in search for some work and food and now he had none at his disposal.  I just stepped a few steps back doubting his intention whether he would snatch my wallet or not and gave ten bucks to the man and literally darted off the footpaths as possible.
Some points to be noted:
The man told me he and his family had no food since the morning.
As for me I was just returning PG spending some quality time in KFC with my college gang. 
Although I gave them 10 bucks whereas on my way to home I could not even figure out what could I manage with ten bucks with 3 people at disposal. I really wish I could have given them a bit more.give Although my wallet had a good amount of cash at that time but I didn't.

So what is the Solution?
To give more to the family? If you suggest so then you must define 'more'. More is a term driven by needs and apart from basic needs , other needs can't be estimated properly enough. I may be / may not be a guy who gets a loaded payslip at the end of the month but that should no be taken into account in this case . Everyone must do their own bit. That is the aim.Still its an ideal statement. If you are a person with utmost good intentions at your heart may be u have also failed some time in delivering your bit . So alternatively and realistically this statement goes like that Even if others are not doing their part , that does not mean that you have the right to play down your part.  I am going to tell you why I gave ten bucks to that man . Firstly ....reason of why I could not give more is my selfish nature......that I admit. And why I gave because the moment I stared at his daughter's eyes I saw those eyes tired but not worried about what they were going to do at that night. Remember when you were small, you always believed that no matter what goes wrong your parents would be there to set it right for you. Well, I gave ten bucks so that the girl did not loose that belief at such tender age.

Maybe you call this a lecture from a stupid guy who pretend to be a smart in his blog, maybe you ignore my appeal for humanity but that night I felt all those questions on my head needed an answer not from me..from U...
Food for thought: U don't eat up your birthday cake alone, u just share it with your friends and families. 

           Value of life is in Sharing.

 

Covered Pages-I

I gasped for my fresh air as I entered the rooms. The rooms are dark and mystic. Down as I strolled past through the deserted corridors they keep their vacant looks fixed upon me. They are also wondering what a visitor is doing at this time in night.

I have a feeling I had been here before. The  strong sense within me grew strong as I hit the long porch in the midway. The moonlight beamed through the glass panes to reflect my surroundings. But my surroundings are changing constantly. I realized I am in a dream.

 I remember when i was a child I always looked upon my Baba as a friend rather than a strict parent. So when I was with Baba I always tried to act mature to show him that I am becoming responsible. He was a relief to be around. Like someone' there when you are not feeling good ucan always tell your heart out and leave all your worries with him. I realized today Baba is not talking.He never talks with me when he comes into my dream. My surroundings are once again changing.

Alarm Clock ringing at 7:30. Here I am, up in the morning preparing for office. U must be wondering what are these dreams for. First One ...Loneliness..missing my friends like anything, like I need to talk carefree with someone. Still I meet Sou and other pals. They are all good but maximum are technical discussions/career related discussions. Sometimes I really feel I need some more breath. My life has taken a sudden outright turn before I have ever anticipated. And for the 2nd dream I wish I could have cried a bit more during my father's death. Like u will console me that it happens ..Ya i know...when he died i cried because i could not accept the fact tht he died. But from then I became mature. I became more responsible. I took my own decisions, learn t my way to fight.But nowdays I feel tired. I wish I can refer to someone when I am in trouble and put my trust on him with a faith that this man will do everything to keep the sorrow aloof from me. Now I miss father for that. And a confession. Its paining inside the heart badly while I am writing this. [n.b: when u put ur heart out it pains..it the sign u r doing it really]The highly contrast situation in my current situation is my room mate in sync with his gf nagging and continiously freaking me out. I know it sounds weird but sometimes I do wonder if I have really grown up or not.

12:26 at night and may be when i will hit bed the time will tick past 12:30. I will be better off now. I don't know when will I publish it or whether will I publish it anyday. There is a quote "Some questions are better not to be answered" or may be it is designed so to protect the coward bloggers like me.

If it's U ....Thn Only....

This is not a love story. Rather you can say an analysis of the world of love from my point of view. Maybe there in my analysis of love is embedded some truths that i have kept hidden from myself for all those years. Then why i am letting it out now? I can't reach out to her. I can't even spell it. Then write it down. I know thw "Pen is Mightier than Swords " only in those futile words still its only those futility of words that engulf me now not in any hope but in their own world of loneliness where i speak to hear myself so that i can relish the viability of my feelings.

A boy meets up a girl to fall in love. Then why do i am twisting it up through these dark words. Yes , dark words for sure.  When a simple love story, a feeling so natural yet beautiful is hassled and chained down by so much complicated words they they must be rightfully tagged as "dark". It;s dark. Even better, its complicated. May be the boy knows it all inside...May be he's been for 1st time in true love with the girl. But he is not sure about a lot of things. The most common query " Does she love me? " Or " Do i stand any chance? " May be the boy also values the frend what she has been in all those years and values it so much that he risks losing the frend. Maybe she deserves someone better.....

Logical doubts i agree. Some cheesy guy around the corner of a street will tell you "Listen to your heart yaar...dimag ko choro.."  Technically the guy who does not act according to his brain we tag him as being "mental". So the choice is yours whether u love reasonably or love "madly" .

This post is not meant to draw any conclusion. Better i tell you its not a post. Its me. In this case the author is also searching paths in these mazes. Maybe sometimes the author seeks the solution from its readers. This time i face "My Mirror".;-)

"And They Lived Happily Ever After........"

This is THE POST. The post which i am waiting to write for so long. This is my first ever venture into the sagas of queen and knights. In short today i present you with my version of LOVE STORY.....

But why a love story? The reason is simple enough. Love it or hate it..u will read it. Simply u can't ignore it. Neither me. That is the sole reason why after reading so many love stories i decided why not try a hand at it. Candid romantic yet simple tales are quite missing now a days . Most of the 90 rupees books can bore you to death. They come up with the most intelligent titles [" the 1st kiss in the rain" and blah blah ] with most rotten stories. I don't blame the authors also because most of them are ex IITians  or passed from an reputed B School. If you are an ex IITian and now you want to earn your living by writing those stories then its quite evident on how much booze or grass u have inhaled in your grad years.

CONTROL!!!!!!!!.... I am not gonna pester on them for now. Right now i am going to write a love story. A love story where the boy meets her girl...birds chirp....background music coming from somewhere [ may be from music director's room...never mind] and where the end is for good and they lived happily ever after. Yes..I know u can feel it now. Because we all are inherently romantic. It is the same reason why any boy before texting a girl or saying " hi" thinks twice and any girl thinks thrice before replying appropriately.

Ok ..enough side talks. Let me start from the very start. There is a boy named Tom. There is a girl named Jerrey.. Someday they meet and instantly fell in love. Love blossomed and they decided that they should live together. Now living together do mean a lot of things. It requires accepting each other...understanding each other..not only good things but also bad things. Yes u can feel i am being preachy..like I am pretending to be the Love Guru...I am not a Love Guru but I do consider myself an expert in judging these matters right. For the record I consider u too of having the same expertise. After hearing, gossiping and visualizing a lot of your friend's love stories and the love birds here and there if you still pretend to be the immature fellow with an innocent look in his face then get a life. We all know everything. There nothing to be modest.about.

Hold on. Since you know everything now i am going to ask u about the thought that kicked me to write this piece.... "Can "they" live happily ever after ? " Here goes my answer. They simply can't. People in love will frown "WHY???" Because they are"THEY".  U can live happily. I can. But "They" can't and definitely not when we are considering the huge and vast domain of "EVER AFTER".

WHAT THE HELL??? I am supposed to write a love story. And just as every writer before commencing their act thinks of creating a masterpiece..i too thought of creating a Love Saga where there would be true LOVE....where my Tom would create something to be honored as the 9th Wonder of the World. or where my Jerrey would cry for Tom just as Madhubala did in Mughle Azam. Forget the classics..mine is far worse than love stories of Dino Morea or Bobby Deol [ atleast they have hot heroines and item dances in those films] . Ok . Finally here it is. My dashing hero Tom fell in love with beautiful Jerry and they lived.................    Nah never mind  ;-)

N.B: DON'T READ THIS...U CAN GET CONFUSED !!!

The Last Page in My Notebook

"I miss U " ..... 
                    Do I ? Do  I really? I hardly call u . I sometimes text u . Sometimes we chat.In case we meet up in college I say u "hi/hello and hey how r u ? " kind of stuffs . In all the times of my life u r just a part of my "sometime" . So why do i miss u ?


The steps that we climbed together...pranks that we played on each other and mostly the exams that we cheated together...u remember them all ..Don't u ?? Same here buddy... U also know the girl in whose presence i felt so out of place..bewildered and totally a pappu types...but you know what miss out of all this? Not the girl ..not the semester exams [ p.s: i m glad its finally over..in case there's a 9th semester i would be screwed totally]   but its my part in those memories ...i will miss the most. I will definitely not miss the girl who found me so dumb all the time but i will miss my dumbness which is bound to occur before that girl every time. In  short....how intelligent i am or stupid, witty in presence of u...precisely what i  reflect on your eyes...i will miss that most.


U know..when i was a small kid..what i hated most...that is when my notebook ends....when i have filled up the last page of my notebook with my dicey twirling..twisting..dancing handwriting...I knew that i can again read it back...i can keep it to myself as long as i can...but u know...... i can't write it once again...Its over. So if you ask me now if i remember every pages of my notebook or if u say do u miss every pages of notebook i can't say yes. Because i can't remember them all. All that I remember .....yes I had a notebook...i had colors and inks to fill with it...and it's just over now. I miss it because i can't write it once again.


Did i miss out in saying something...............


                                          P.S: I Love My Notebook ..........

.

THE RED FACED GUY

 

I feel irritated. Someone's following me everywhere I go. Yes I am sure of that. I can't persist his cold long stare in my eyes for long. From the shadows of him that lingers away with mine I can tell his presence behind. He limped behind me in a careless manner almost in an inaudible way.  I feel restless. I have toiled long and hard to taste the fruits of success and now when it's time I must rejoice, I must boast of it, blew away trumphets to proclaim my successful stories of life. But again something is holding me back. I turn around. Yes it's him!!!!

A deep hatred surged up inside my thorat.  I am getting late. I have to join my folks back where I belong to the chores of celebration, to rejoice for the commencement of our new life as professionals. I don't have time to squander away on someone so insignificant. Now I am getting angry.I have to stop someone following me. I have to be safe and sound at the end of the day. I picked up a stone. But..........I stopped!!!!

How can I hurt someone who is already wounded? Someone who needs help, care, affection. The red faced guy is not just red.  It's more than just a color. It's blood. He has his blood stained all over his fragile body.  He has been limping all the way back following me. He trembles now and them and is weakened to his feet. He is crying.

I tried to heal him up.... I tried to heal him up.....but I failed. He is just bleeding incessantly.  But the guy is not concerned about his blood. He is still staring at me right through my eyes. As if every heart beats of  mine are synchronizing with him, the every thought that comes to my head is anticipated by him. I feel disgust. Is this guy human? Why is he acting so monotonous? And why is he following me?? I just blurted out to him.... "WHY????".....

".....To decide what is right and what is wrong. To stand by you when you decide good or bad. To discriminate between the falsity of words with the truth from heart. I am someone whom you own your childhood innocence, your every truth and every lies and ur countless attempts to evade away from the truth. Someone who wants to scream, someone who tries to enact in situations, someone whom you fear to duel with. That's why you evade me.U suppress me. I don't want to bribe away someone to get my work done, but u did. That's why u suppressed me. When you welcome the news of ongoing slaughters in your own state with the morning cup of tea, I feel hurt. I bleed. I want to enact. I want to pacify them. But what you do is make some fun comments about the parties involved and digress away from it and calculate to what monthly sum 3.14 converge and daydream of it.When you see someone giving a slang to a fellow person, I want to beat him up and teach him some manners. But what you care is for and while loops on your self made world. When you see your own countrymen giving a damn about your motherland and goes on shitting and splitting everywhere , first thing I want to do is teach him some ettiquate but you still walk away. When by chance you come across any rightful proper action, something good I know you want to celebrate just like me. Yes, I am bleeding. And that is the sole reason you have shut myself up deep witihn yourself. I have been bleeding since then and I will bleed so until you choose to make a difference. To decide what is right and what is wrong....I am just your CONSCIENCE ........"

Oh!!!! It's past 9 o' clock . The alarm clock is wailing right beside my ears. I have been sleeping past due time and it is the yells of my mother that engulf me right now.  My head feels heavy. I bet you would also feel it when you go through any hard hitting dream like this. As I prepared myself for morning tea the words from that red faced guy lingers up in my head. As the left over words savaged my morning , I take a peep in the daily newspaper. Oh yes !!!! He's not just in my dream . Here I see him completely.  He has been more darkened by new blood. Yes he his crying again for the nine people who lost their lives in just another day of Netai village.

Roadside Romeo

 From "Billorani", "hot chicks" to "Tota" in the film New York most of the films have their own unique flamboyant style of addressing girls. If you think me as a kind of oldies who have certain reservation for the use of these terms i can assure i am not. It's just a dialogue. It's for a simple fun. But when cases like Aarushi Talwar and several rape cases are in rise all all around us i think it's high time for us to look beyond the phrase "just 4 fun yaar!!!".

U can always find them around every corner of the streets. They have always been  there through ages and different seasons around the year in different face and form. I would be wrong if I generalize all of them as the Roadside Romeos. They prefer to be in their herd otherwise they themselves consider their existence as insignificant one. A true point on which i must agree with them.U can identify that herd because they have very general topics left for them to discuss among themselves....the local bar, if any new girl in the town or the body parts about of any particular girl. All the raunchy, grubby topics on this solar system are at their disposal. In the days of ultra sophistication they can also come up with phrases that can justify their behavior towards the girls. They are just the dickheads who consider their dicks to be of prime importance in the entire planet.

You might be thinking right now why the hell i am wasting my blog space on these miserable creatures who have no scope of improvement. Right u r. But when they can't be cured, they can be prevented. I am not advising you to pick up a fight on a ratio of 5:1. These physic morons are actually a result of lack of proper parental care and society problems. Their existence is so troubled and so insignificant from the early days that they think by bobbling some raunchy jokes, mugging some porn stuffs day & night, hurling comments and being a nuisance to the girls can earn them the dignity of being an proper "Adult".

I know the morons on whose thoughts i am venting my anger on my keypads is never going to pick an eye for this post. Rather this post has the probability to be scanned by some good people who don't have resemblance in any shape and form to those cheapos and that is why i am emphasizing for them to have a eye for prevention since these people can't be cured. Otherwise cases like Arushi Talwar and other rape cases on different parts of this country can't be prevented. You can say the responsibility also rests on the judicial system but I better not speak about a system or rather refrain from commenting about a system where judicial action is implemented just for name whereas the action part is destined and delayed for several generations to come. CBI, the top notch agency has itself closed the case of Aarushi Talwar due to lack of proper evidences despite the repeated pleas of the parents and relative of the victim. The mockery lies on the fact is we depend on a system which after 175 deaths, 300 severely injured persons in 26/11 has taken a time of 1.5 years (approx.) to announce death sentence to the lone convict. That is the sole reason it's time for us to pay heed to the cry of humanity within us and step up for an issue if it demands.

Since these post is on the "Roadside Romeos" i would like to state a simple fact for them: Girls are beautiful. Life is colorful only for them. If you do like a girl you can express feelings for her. Every girl loves appreciation. If you find a girl beautiful feel free to stare at her but do not ogle. There is a thick line between that.

Remember Beauty is to be preserved... not to be destroyed!!!